Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Seven Year Anniversary

A lot of people ask me about what is was like to be a stand up comedian. My close friends know, because I've told them thousands of times, that it was one of the top 10 worst things I've ever done and that to this day I still feel a sense of shame that comes along with making a complete ass out of yourself in front of everyone you know and hundreds of strangers. I mean really, punchlines like Icingland? I Guess He Was Good With Dogs? A thousand dicks in my ass? These are jokes I wrote myself! WTF! Incredibly it's the seven year anniversary of that night. I like to act like it was the worst thing ever, and in some ways it was of course, but at the same time somewhere deep inside there's a teeny bit of pride that after I committed I stuck to it and and gave the performance of a lifetime. Take a look at the action below. May 3rd, 2003!

With my joke notes getting ready to take the stage.

An enthusiastic fan base with Joel in the back beaming.

Custom signs for people's favorite jokes. There was "Hot Quarter" signs everywhere!

My energetic performance!

Lucky Canadian socks in my coat pocket!

The "Oregon's Funnyman" flier that brought so many people to the show.

People laughing like crazy!

In this picture you can see some people's shock, boredom and jealousy shining through.

Or maybe it was just disbelief in how bad it was.

Probably the best joke I ever wrote is about a man getting a sex change. One thing about it though, most people under 25 or so didn't get it.

The joke: This guy in his 60's has never been comfortable with his body. He's always known the issue but never wanted to face it until now. He goes to the doctor and tells him the problem and the doctor says "Are you sure? A sex change is a big deal." The man replies "I'm sure doc. I'm ready for this." So he gets the operation and he becomes a woman. The doctor says to him when he awakens from the operation "Now you need to go to a support group until you're comfortable being a woman. Share your life with others going through the same thing." A few days later he goes to his first support group meeting. It's a large room full of woman... just like him. A woman stands up and says to the crowd "Welcome everyone. I'm glad you all could make it. Let me be the first to say my name is Jennifer and I used to be a hooker!" The crowd erupts in cheering and calls of 'welcome Jennifer.' A second woman stands up and says "My name is Angie, and I used to be a hooker!" People greet her with howls of support. The 60 year old woman who used to be a man stands up and looks around the room confused. The place falls silent as all eyes are upon her. She says "My name is Michelle and I think I might be in the wrong room. I used to be TJ Hooker!"


Travis said...

I thought you were going to do a reunion show, my hopes were dashed but nice to see those old photos again and relive times when I didn't want to die so much because there was real humor in the world.

ssojk said...

Now that I see the pic, I do remember beaming! That is one of my rarest beams, 'The Beam of Disbelief.'

RolandBV said...

I want to be called a beamer! Look at the pictures! I'm a BEAMER!